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Marriage Issues

Q:

I have a question in regards to my husband. He is a good man but he does not fast nor does he pray. I pray and fast but I find it difficult to hold onto the straight path alone. I spend my salat having to ignore the loud TV sounds in the background while I pray. My husband will play a TV show and sometimes these shows have music and I have to listen to this while praying. It is getting very hard to hold onto my deen while being married to him. What do I do? I love him and I do not want to divorce but I myself am becoming weaker in my faith. What should I do? I have to fast ramadan alone. I pray alone. I listen to islamic lectures alone. I am memorizing the Quran alone. I feel like the only muslim in my house some days. What is the islamic thing to do? I have been giving my husband dawah for over a year now. I causally will have Islamic lectures playing. I let the Quran play but he does not seem motivated in the slightest bit and it worries me. I myself have been slacking in my prayers now and delaying them and it worries me that I might be losing myself while being married to him. What is your advice? Jazak Allah Khair

A:


Alaikum salam sister.
Im sure you must be going through a very challenging and difficult state in your life but since you admit your husband is a good man shows that you are not ready to separate with him and there is a great potential in him to accept and embrace whats Good. The fact that he is not a practicing muslim could be because he is having a problem either in the ideology of Islam and its principles i.e. Aqeeda or maybe he wants to be free and not be bound to any duty or responsibility.  If its likely to be the former then you can maybe refer him to a scholar whom he can be in touch with and ask all his questions.
If its the latter, then keep on talking slowly whilst having your faith intact  remember that if your faith falters theres no chance of saving another persons so you have to remain steadfast against all odds.

Dont loose your faith and practice at the exepense of anyone because you will have lost the greatest asset in your life and hereafter.  Latch yourself to a religious and scholarly freind who can constantly guide you and and you could be in touch with her often preferabely a community member.  Keep on with your practises even if you see no difference in him and question yourself about your priorities of whom you wish to please which if you be sincere then it will only be for Allah. And that will certainly start making an impact on him. The entire Result maybe very slow but its sure to come.

I hope you can face this trial and get many rewards from it.  Remember keep on praying for your spouse to get the guidance from Allah and go on with your duties towards the Almighty. After all the result of everything lies with Allah who is most concerned about all his creatures and He will surely help both of you.
 
Ask An Alim Team
Under the Guidance of S.Alawi