I've been going through a really tough time in my life and I am experiencing a divorce. Sometimes I feel so upset and I think about why God is punishing me or I have a really big disillusionment from God. I have also begun to judge people and think badly of them even though my heart does not want to do this. I really want my faith in God to increase and to be a good person. Please can you give me help with anything I can do to make my heart soft and forgiving and strong again. I just feel so lost and i don't want to get any further from God because I want to be a good Muslim.
I feel really far away from Allah and sometimes I have been having negative and bad thoughts about God, including swearing. I feel so bad and I don't know why these thoughts come into my head and then I think God won't forgive me and I feel so upset and sad. I really don't know what to do and i am just feeling so lost and disillusioned
Please can you help me